Mungkin hujan adalah satu-satunya cara langit

mengungkapkan kerinduannya kepada bumi.

Erin Brockovich

Film lama sih, tapi baru nonton kemarin. ERIN BROCKOVICH adalah film yang diinspirasi kisah nyata tentang seseorang yang bernama Erin Brockovich, seorang janda pengangguran dengan tiga orang anak yang memiliki banyak hutang. 

Suatu hari karena suatu kecelakaan yang berakhir di proses hukum, ia berhadapan dengan seorang pengacara. Di tengah keputusasaannya akan pengangguran dan hutang, ia memaksa bekerja di firma hukum pengacara tersebut. Di sanalah, walau tanpa latar pendidikan hukum, ia membuka sebuah file hukum mengenai PG&E, sebuah perusahaan gas dan minyak yang Erin cari tahu ternyata melakukan penipuan dan menyebabkan kerusakaan lingkungan dan kesehatan pada warga sekitarnya. Dari pekerjaannya yang awalnya hanya sekedar menyambung hidup, ia akhirnya bekerja keras untuk membantu para warga yang dirugikan tersebut untuk memperoleh keadilan.

Bagian terbaik film ini menurut saya adalah saat Erin bekerja keras dalam membantu orang-orang yang dirugikan tersebut dan saat ia mendatangi mereka satu per satu dan peduli kondisi kesehatan mereka, itu mengharukan, such a heart-to-heart conversation.

Erin Brockovich kini menjadi juru hukum Amerika dan aktivis lingkungan dan
telah memiliki perusahaannya sendiri yang bernama Brockovich Foundation.

About the Movie:

As long as you got the guts, world will help you. As long as you have the sincere hearts on your effort, God will help you. Do not search for an opened door, but made your own door, window, or any path that can reach your destination.

Happy Birthday Ilham Nara

This is a picture combination that I've made for a best friend's birthday

Happy Birthday Ilham Nara. I wish you the very happy life

We love you and best friend forever!

Bonus

Tadi pagi gue kesiangan bangun, atau lebih tepatnya kelamaan ngulet sih, jadi lelet. Seperti biasa gue naik ojek menuju jalan depan, baru naik angkot ke tempat kerja gue yang jaraknya kira-kira setengah jam. Saat mau bayar ojek, gue mengeluarkan uang sepuluh ribu rupiah (dimana dompet gue isinya sepuluh ribuan semua), tapi abang ojeknya ga ada kembalian, cuman ada dua ribu. Yaudah, sekalian deh ngasih bonus sama abang ojeknya, normalnya sih tiga ribu ojek ke depan jalan, tapi dikasih bonus lebih dikit aja, dianya makasih-makasih terus gitu hehehe.

Abis itu gue naik angkot ke tempat kerja gue. Pas mau bayar angkot, gue ngeluarin uang sepuluh ribu lagi. Eh, taunya abang angkotnya belum ada kembalian. Terus gue bilang ga ada uang lain juga, cuman ada dua ribu, kata abangnya gapapa kok dua ribu aja (yang normalnya lima ribu). Waaw, bonus kecil yang gue kasih sama abang ojek sebelumnya langsung dibales sama abang angkot satu itu. Hihi, sepanjang pagi gue cekikikan ingetnya. Betapa lucu.

Orang tua temen gue pernah bilang sih, katanya semua orang suka bonus. Semacam keju yang ditambah di makanan, nilai yang dibulatkan keatas, denda buku perpustakaan yang dibulatkan kebawah, dan bonus-bonus lain. Mamanya temen gue itu bilang sering-seringlah kasih bonus-bonus kecil ke teman, pegawai, pasien, dan siapapun yang kalian temui, karena beberapa bonus kecil bisa membawa kebahagiaan untuk seseorang, seenggaknya selama hari itu masih berlangsung. Semua orang suka bonus, kan?

The Journeys: Kisah Perjalanan Para Pencerita

"It's better to travel well than to arrive", Buddha

Buku ini menceritakan kisah-kisah perjalanan para penulis dengan isi yang sangat beragam. Pencerita pada buku ini beragam mulai dari travel writer, penulis komedi, penulis skenario, novelis, dan sebagainya. Kisah yang diceritakan pada buku ini juga beragam dengan gaya bahasa dan sudut pandang tiap cerita yang berbeda satu sama lain.

Sekali lagi gue tegaskan, buku ini beragam banget. Buku ini berisikan 12 cerita perjalanan. Beberapa perjalanan merupakan perjalanan resmi dengan kebanyakan cerita lain dengan niat murni travelling. Beberapa ditulis dengan gaya bahasa sopan nan indah, sedangkan beberapa cerita ditulis dengan kocak. Tempat yang diceritakan juga ada yang di dalam negeri, ada juga yang nun jauh di Afrika sana.

Beberapa contoh cerita dalam buku ini antara lain anugerah alam yang ajaib di Karimun Jawa, ketenangan desa di Shuili, sisi lain Singapura yang memang mengesankan, kedamaian dan manisnya Swiss, dan lain-lain. Semua cerita mendeskripsikan bagaimana tempat tersebut sebagaimana buku mengenai travelling bercerita, tetapi di buku ini, banyak hal-hal lain yang para penulis ceritakan di luar konteks sebatas melihat-lihat.

Tiap cerita dalam buku ini memberi inspirasi. Seperti kata buku ini, "Perjalanan adalah sebuah proses menemukan". Dari hal yang paling kecil hingga yang paling besar, mereka bercerita hal yang mereka temukan di dalam diri mereka sendiri maupun di luar diri mereka. Pokoknya, banyak pelajaran manis dari buku ini. 

Kalau favorit gue, cerita dari Windy Ariestanty yang berjudul Lucerne: A Morning Kiss Bye from A Stranger. Disitu dia cerita banyak sudut manis orang Swiss, yang banyak memberi kita pelajaran.

Rating: 3.8/5

Selamat Idul Fitri. Minal Aidin wal Faidzin, mohon maaf lahir dan batin. Semoga kehidupan kita dipenuhi berkah dan kebahagiaan. Aamin.

Idul Fitri kali ini gue habiskan di Lubuk Linggau aja, tempat gue internship saat ini. Alasannya? Karena tiket mahal sehingga uangnya buat nanti liburan aja dan juga karena suka males kalau pulang tapi waktunya cuman sebentar.

Sholat Ied kali ini cukup berkesan, ceramahnya bagus, sama seperti ceramah-ceramah yang selalu dikasih di tarawih di Masjid Agung Lubuk Linggau ini. Beneran deh, ceramah-ceramah di Masjid Agung sini bagus-bagus, gue sampe tiap malam kalau tarawih selalu nunggu ceramahnya. 

Ceramah kali ini sih cerita mengenai makna lebaran. Bapak penceramah bersuara merdu itu juga bilang, "tidak mungkin mengubah orang salah menjadi orang soleh dengan cepat", kata dia lebih baik kita yang sekarang sholat Idul Fitri walau sholat lima waktunya bolong, dibanding mereka yang tidak keduanya, lebih baik kita yang puasa tetapi tidak sholat, daripada tidak sholat dan tidak puasa. Semoga saja perlahan-lahan seiring waktu, kita bisa berubah, semuanya melalui proses. Gitu katanya.

Selain itu, ada pidato perpisahan setelah sekitar 10 tahun walikota sini menjabat, bagus pidatonya. Dia bilang, siapapun calon walikota nanti, semuanya adalah orang Indonesia, orang Lubuk Linggau, sehingga semuanya saudara kita. Setelah itu juga tadi ada segmen khusus doa untuk Afghanistan, Rohingya Myanmar, dan lain-lain.

Yeah, semoga kita menjadi seseorang yang baru, yang lebih baik :)

Human Nature

Human Nature - Michael Jackson

Reaching out to touch a stranger
Electric eyes are everywhere
See that girl, she knows I'm watching
She likes the way I stare

If they say, why, why? Tell 'em that is human nature

Jendela Bus, Kamar Mandi, dan Internship

Apa persamaan jendela bus, kamar mandi, dan intership?

Semuanya membuat kita, atau setidaknya gue, berpikir lebih lama dan lebih dalam tentang sesuatu. Coba kalau lagi di kamar mandi, pasti banyak pikiran-pikiran singgah ke benak kita, sama halnya kalau di jendela bus, sambil mandangin keluar jalan, pasti banyak pikiran-pikiran penting atau engga, yang menyelusup masuk ke dalam pikiran. Internship juga seperti itu, Bedanya, kamar mandi memberikan pikiran-pikiran tadi dalam hitungan menit, jendela bus mungkin menit hingga jam, dan intership berhari-hari.

Entahlah, sejak internship ini, saking banyaknya waktu luang yang kosong, bikin gue makin banyak pikiran. Dari yang paling serius sampe yang enggak penting, dari yang penting diingat hingga yang seharusnya dilupakan, mengenai khayalan-khayalan masa lalu sampe khayalan-khayalan masa depan, juga mengenai penyesalan masa lalu sampai rencana masa depan. Yah, semua pikiran ini sifatnya spontan. Tanpa diundang, mereka masuk aja.

Di kota kecil seperti ini, hiburan hampir engga ada, paling hanya tempat makan dan karaoke, sisanya ya kami menghabiskan kesibukan sendiri-sendiri, mulai dari membaca, menonton, atau lainnya. Waktu sendiri lebih banyak, yang buat gue suka kangen bahkan jatuh ke arah mellodrama karena kekangenan itu, Kangen sama orang tua, rumah, apalagi teman-teman deket gue, dan sama Jakarta juga, ugh, betapa kangennya sama kota sendiri.

Te echo de menos, mis amigos, mi familia y mi ciudad :')

Just my own #1 chart this week. I listen to this everyday on this week.

Faces that Reflect those Feelings

01.00 AM. I woke up after some random-in-one dreams in my sleep. Feeling hungry and trying hard to get up and make slices of bread with chocolate jam in it. I'm passing my parents bedroom and found the lights still turn on. I went inside and found them already fall asleep.

I'm seeing those faces. The face of my 65 years old dad and 60 years old mom. I stare straight at their faces, which made me feel weak, sad, and afraid.

Their faces, with the wrinkles lining on it. I looked deeply to their faces, and found such a mirror on it.
A mirror that reflects old, exhaustion, tired, boredom, sadness and maybe despair.
A mirror of face that reflects thousands of those sad feeling.
How time flies so fast.
Deep feeling. So deep until I even feels like some of my breaths are taken away by the lifetime keeper.
Such a melancholy mirror.

I went back to my room, seeing how long I had leave this room of mine until I came home just today.
Oh, melancholy mirror, will I found that feelings on my face either.
I saw my face on mirror on my room, wondering what I will see.

I'm seeing the reasons why my parents live.
I'm seeing their lost spirit of life.
and it's like I'm seeing the happiest thing that ever exist on their life.

I love you, Ayah & Bunda :')

I know it's wrong, silly, and embarrassing, but I can't control this fear.
I guess its already reach the phobia level. Everytime I watch it or even simply overheard it, my heart suddenly beats so fast, so suddenly until it sometimes hurts. Then it gave me headache and shortness of breath after it. Oh, such a undesirable and pathologic feeling.

Grgrhrgrhgrhr, I should meet psychiatrist to help me get over this phobia :|
Allah SWT, please...

The Friends that Started with F.

SNMPTN. Ah, five years ago. How old am I.

Back on Senior High, I wasn't a student academic excellence. I was only a little beyond average, underlined the little and average word. But when it comes to SMPB (or SNMPTN, they called it this day), I was totally enthusiast about it. I straightly choose Medical Faculty Unsri on my 1st choice. 

It was about one month to SMPB after the graduation, and sometimes I miss those one month. That one month is an important thing that brought me to the path that I'm walking on now. 

I took my spmb preparation on KSM Salemba, and I like it, especially the people and its atmosphere. So my daily life there started with classes that started form 8 to 12, mini try out everyday from 1 to 3, and this is what i like the most, self learning from 3 'till anytime we want to. When I home, I studied on dining table until 3 am, everyday. I really want to pass so bad.

Ah, how I miss that moment. I used to study with four of my friends, which now I'm become very close of. There are all started with F: Fatur, Fenty, and Ferra. We did studying from 3 to 8 pm, while chattering and laughing at something. They are all nice. Very nice. Really love them :)

Khalifaturrasyidin is now finishing his degree on ITB, Fenty on Chemistry UNJ, and Ferra already became an pharmacist on Erha clinic. I wish we could meet on someday, and having good time like we used to be. I wish you the very best of luck. Toast!

#1 La Peau: Kopi. Teh. Susu

Kopi.Teh.Susu

Di kafe yang berarti kulit dalam bahasa prancis itu, yang dimiliki spesialis kulit ternama di selatan Jakarta, kami bertiga berkumpul seperti hari-hari yang sama setiap bulannya. La Peau, nama kafenya, yang lebih sering kami sebut "Lapak" karena tidak ada satu pun dari kami yang bisa berbahasa Prancis. Aku belajar bahasa Jerman saat SMA dulu, temanku satu lagi pernah pertukaran pemuda ke Belanda, dan yang satu lagi sedang les bahasa Rusia, walau baru tau cara membaca huruf-hurufnya. Tidak ada yang tau tentang bahasa Prancis, yang akhirnya membuat kami gemas bertanya-tanya, "itu gimana sih cara bacanya?", yang kami diskusikan sendiri jawabannya antara La-pe, La-pu, La-pa, La-peyauw, La-poh, dan lain-lain, tanpa niat bertanya kepada pelayan kafe. Seorang anak kecil berlarian dan mengeja nama kafe itu sampai kepalanya miring 90 derajat lalu berteriak "L-la-pak!", sambil berlarian lagi. Dan debat kusir kami bertiga selesai, kami lebih percaya pada anak kecil itu.

Setiap malam Sabtu, kami bertiga bertemu di kafe itu. Kami selalu memesan jumlah dan jenis minuman yang sama, hanya dengan menu yang berbeda-beda. Di meja depan sofa warna biru tua dibawah lampu yang temaram itu, selalu ada tiga jenis minuman: teh, kopi, dan susu. Entah itu green tea, thai tea, teh tarik, atau hanya es teh manis, Brema akan selalu memesan itu. Aku selalu dengan susu, kadang milkshake, ice milk, ice chocolate, atau es susu biasa. Lain lagi Radit, yang setia dengan kopi, kadang black espresso, cappuccino, latte, atau ice coffee biasa.

***

Baru menyeruput green tea-nya sekali, Brema langsung bercerita sambil menaikkan kedua alisnya. Dia memang punya energi yang selalu lebih diantara kami, berapapun letihnya dia. 

"Eh, tau nggak? Gue si-al bang-nget hari ini..."

About Reading

I used to be frequently depressed and insecure back when I was a university student and clerkship because sometimes, I can’t get the meaning of what I read on textbooks easily. Usually, after I read something, I don’t get the point, and when it comes to tomorrow, I’m kinda forgetful. This really made me depressed and insecure. I mean, I have read the books and journals with all my heart and concentration, but still I can’t remember it easily (“ah, kok gue nggak tau, padahal gue udah baca. Ah, kemaren kan gue udah baca, kok bisa lupa masalah ini”). While, my roommate was a super smart person, who almost never read a book or only once in a week, but he just seems to know anything. Sigh.

But, it was just a story of yesterdays. Nowadays, still, sometimes I don’t remember easily things I read, but I almost never found myself in such insecurity like I used to be. This is because a very good person, and many people think he is the smartest Anesthesiology resident on my hospital, Mr. Darma Putra. It was a day after my night shift, like a sleeping walk zombie on a surgery, He tested me several random question, some was good answered, but several are totally unanswered, I told him, “Sigh, the fact is I already read it twice”, and he replied like this:

“Read a lot. If you cannot understand it once, read it twice. If you still cannot understand it twice, read it three times. If you still cannot understand it three times, read it ten times. It is not your problem if you see other people are so good that they can understand when they read it only once. It’s their gift, and it is your responsibility and privilege to read it more than one time. Read it, have perseverance”

Those words he said still cling on my mind and I think it’s going to last for my entire life. He probably doesn’t remember what he said that day, but it changed my life and perspective positively. I once read a quote that good words are long lasting and life changing. Now, I don’t have the reason not to believe it. Thanks, Doc.

Just Ordinary Confession

The truth is…

I am never sure about increment that started with 8, from elementary until now.

Like 8+4, 8+5, 8+6, 8+7, and 8+9. I simply have to count it with fingers everytime I face it.

If you ask me spontaneously now, I cannot answer it.

Bandung, Kota Hujan

Adikku yang SD sering tertukar. Dia bilang, Bandung adalah kota hujan (karena hari selalu hujan saat kami pergi kesana) dan Bogor adalah kota kembang (karena satu-satunya yang ia tahu tentang Bogor adalah Kebun Raya Bogor). Aku mengoreksinya hingga kesalahan tersebut masih ia pegang terus hingga bangku SMP. 

***

Aku melihat perempuan itu sedang berdiri sendiri dibawah payung putih bening yang transparan, yang membuat tarian hujan terlihat telanjang jika ia mendongakkan kepalanya. D-i-a, perempuan semampai berkacamata yang kadang masuk menyelinap di pikiranku sejak beberapa bulan ini, sejak tahun kuliah baru dimulai. Sayangnya aku tidak punya alasan untuk mendekati seorang adik kelas itu. Terlalu malu tepatnya. 

Dia terlalu kadang-kadang menyelinap pikiran hingga aku tidak sadar ia mendekat dan berkata:

"Kak, enggak bawa payung? Mau barengan aja? Daripada maketnya nanti basah kehujanan"

Dan voila! Akhirnya aku mengenalnya, berbincang mengenai ini dan itu, menjelaskan maket yang aku pegang ini, dan tertawa membicarakan beberapa dosen yang ajaib.

Kami berpacaran dua minggu setelah hujan itu. Melakukan banyak hal bersama seperti pada umumnya orang berpacaran. Tapi, aku selalu paling menikmati hari hujan bersamanya. Dimana kami berdua berjalan sambil menikmati tarian hujan disekeliling payung ini. Sampai-sampai. aku berharap hujan lebih sering turun.

***

Adikku yang SD sering tertukar. Dia bilang, Bandung adalah kota hujan (karena hari selalu hujan saat kami pergi kesana) dan Bogor adalah kota kembang (karena satu-satunya yang ia tahu tentang Bogor adalah Kebun Raya Bogor). Kali ini, saat aku pulang ke rumah dan bertemu adikku satu itu. Aku mulai berhenti mengoreksinya dan berharap ia benar.

Happy Birthday Ayah

Sexier

Interesting girl is hard to found nowadays. In years like these, they tend to strive hard to looking cool instead of being herself to looking cool. I know these are too early too think about someones inner personality, but the fact that first impression does matter is true.

Seeing beautiful girl on a sexy outfit, holding a cigarette and drink a glass of beer is not sexy. 

Also a girl on their short skirt walking on a mall, or even a girl that is too busy with her make ups. 

They just now become usual, ordinary, and boring.

But, seeing a beautiful girl who dress politely, with her long black shiny hair, reading a book with her hands writing some notes, in a serious yet catchy way of gesture, and educated way of conversation is.......sexier.

p.s. This random writing is inspired by a lonesome beautiful architecture student I saw on library@senayan. She was totally beautiful and sexy, reading her book while drawing some sort of her architecture assignment. With her sharp eyes, black shiny hair, bright skin tone, and polite way of dress. Too sexy until his boyfriend showed up. Ffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuu

Human Creation

I like watching movies. I think many of us do. There's something on human creation, whether it's a movie, books, short stories, or a single song. There is more than entertainment itself, but much more than that, human creations give us ideas, inspiration, and lessons of life. By watching movies, reading books, or understand lyric of a song, we experienced other human experience without through it, we get the point and lessons, but no need to become that person. We also can see others perspective and point of view trough those human creation. 

That is why, I think we should watch at least one movie each week and read a book at least one in a month. It refresh our minds, broaden our point of view, and have a better reasoning in facing problems. I take some little time to write quotes, meaningful word, or interesting things about the movies or books I just have read on one book, and I'm glad to open it when I want to.

Happy watching, reading, and listening!

Every single person who lives in this world experienced falling in love. Or simpler than that, having a crush. But not everyone brave enough to admit it.

And most of the time, I belong to the latter one.

Belum capek sama cinta, Dam?

The War between Heart and Mind

Have you ever have the thing? When there is a war between your heart and mind, where both of them are in contrary side each other? When logic have to beaten by feeling, vice versa. I believe, we, as a human being, already experienced it.

It could happen in many things and aspects. Through small and big things. Through less important to the most important things, we face it.

It could happen when you thing about more important things like career. Sometimes, in certain people, there are war between mind and heart, logic and feeling. If your mind won the battle, then you choose the job with high salary. If the other side won, you will choose job that goes along with your passion, though you won’t get salary as high as the first.

The war of logic and feeling happens also in less important things like love. In certain people and certain time, love of a person face it’s mind-vs-feeling war. Like someone who have to choose between marrying the one that she loves the most or the one who could give her financial security of a lifetime.

Or, simpler than that, when your logic world tells you that you got to stop thinking someone who hurts you versus your feeling that keep echoing “but I love her”.

There’s a war between heart and mind, between logic and feeling. It can take place anywhere. In your general life, in your career life, love life, through any aspects, whether it is big or small. Surely we will face it. I just pray to God, that we are lucky enough to have peace between two of that contrary side.

So we can have big salary from a job that is our passion.

Have someone to love that guarantees us financial security.

Or have the chance to start over with someone you love that previously hurt you.

God, please give us peace between that :)

Tonight I can Write The Saddest Lines

Tonight I can Write The Saddest Lines

Pablo Neruda 

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, 'The night is shattered and the blue stars shivering in distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.

I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.

How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.

And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.

The night is shattered and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.

My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to search her as though to bring her closer.

My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.

We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.

My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.

Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.

Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms

my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer

and these the last verses that I write for her.

***

This is a poem that tells what I have been feeling these several months.

but you flew with ignorance, so I have to do what the last line says.

Congratulations if you have your new one. I knew you do (or will do)

I love you. But you're just too unreachable, too expensive, 

to careless for even single 'hi' or 'bye'.and I just don't know why you do this. 

Especially after intoxicated by your heavenly bullshit

So I'm walking again. No matter how hard and long-winding it will be.

Currently March 27th

Currently reading: 

 

Ranah 3 Warna - A. Fuadi

Currently listening:

 

 

Cha Cha - Chelo

 

Currently watching:

Another Earth

 

 

Reading Inspires Kids

I found this on youtube. A very nice commercial by Indigo: love of reading fund, an organization that supports reading facilities for children. This video is so sweet :)

Reading inspires kids

How tired I am of this unbearable distance between us

How I long for the toll of the recess bell

Have you forgotten me?

Grown mindless of me?

Tell me I am not writing into an abyss

Or that is what will become of my heart

Move On Medicine - A new branch of study LOL

Long time ago, sleep is just sleep. It’s just an ordinary thing, so if someone have difficulty on it, it will considered as  an ordinary problem, no particular concerns about that. But as human start to realized that sleeping problem alter many daily life aspects, physicians start to analyzed and take a deep concern about it. Then, voila, there’s a new branch in medicine named ‘Sleep Medicine”.

I recently have a random thought, super random after I read along twitter timeline. There I can see, almost everyday, there are people who talks about move on or how hard to deal with ex, and kinds of similar thing. I know it has nothing serious about, but hey, it will do alter human daily life.

I wonder whether there will be a time when there are places that offer some therapy for that. Where psychiatrist or psychologist do psychotherapy for such person. Patients would undergo relaxation, yoga, entertainments, to reduce their loss. Psychiatrist might prescribed some drugs if someone really need it.

Hahaha :D it will be funny.

But hey, many things are possible, right?

C’mon guys, who knows? 

My mom is hospitalized since 5 days ago. The doctor said it was due to problems on her bowel. I'm kinda sad that I can't be there when she need me the most. She said that she'll be fine and no need to concerns about her, she always try to make me not feeling sad, but I knew she need me.

But, I  Thank God that although I can't be there, my best friends are there to take care  of my mom. I even never asked them to do so, but they do. It was heart touching for me. Really :')
and I thank God for people like them in my life. Big thanks, Faiz and Elys.

Happy Birthday, Nabila

Dear, Nabila Nahdy.

I miss the moment when I sat behind you when we were 10^th grade classmate

Also when we shared our laughers and tears.

I miss the moment when we used to take picture by your vibrator-phone that you put in your chest pocket.

I miss the moment when we usually hangout each week. To the movies, karaoke, lunch or dinner, or even a single brunch.

I miss the time when I called you Nabila, Bila, Onta, Nabola, Nabo’ol, Arab etc.

I miss the moment, when we usually celebrate our birthday together.

I miss you, especially today. I know you miss me too.

Happy Birthday, Bil :*

Hugs, Kisses, and many many many miss you :’)

Your best partner

Damar Prasetya

1-1

Beberapa malam yang lalu, gw berbincang-bincang via bbm dengan salah satu temen gw. Awalnya sih berbicara mengenai dia yang baru putus, tapi ujung-ujungnya ngomongin hal-hal lain termasuk pekerjaan.

Kadang, gw iri sama temen gw yang satu itu akan pekerjaannya. Dia, melalui pendidikannya yang hanya kurang lebih enam bulan, bisa memiliki gaji hingga minimal 15 juta per bulannya. Ditambah akses untuk bepergian ke berbagai tempat. 

Sedangkan gw, setelah menyelesaikan pendidikan selama lima tahun, saat ini masih menjalani ikatan kerja di kota terpecil gini, dengan gaji, yah ngga usah ditanya lah ya.

Namun, ternyata sebagai manusia, dari dulu memang terkadang beginilah sifat kita adanya.

Paradox. 

Saat panas menginginkan hujan. Saat hujan menginginkan panas.

Saat kerja menginginkan libur. Saat libur menginginkan kerja.

Dan konsep-konsep serupa yang lain. Termasuk saat kita melihat orang lain yang tampaknya lebih menyenangkan daripada yang kita jalani. 

Malam itu, ya terucap juga dari temen gw itu. Dia bilang iri dengan gw. Dia ingin jadi dokter. Sama seperti gw yang terkadang ingin punya pekerjaan seperti dia. Hahaha, kita sama-sama melihat bahwa pekerjaan satu sama lain menyenangkan. Gw sekarang pengen kerja seperti dia dan dia pengen kerja seperti gw.

Kadang gw galau kepikiran banget untuk kerja seperti dia. Tapi setelah dia mengakui iri juga akan pekerjaan gw, ya jadi agak lega aja bahwa itu semua hanya bunga-bunga pikiran aja.

Yah, walau gw sama dia sama-sama saling iri, 

Kita tau bahwa yang kita jalani sekarang adalah yang terbaik.

And we won't replace it each other.

Karena gw sama dia sama-sama saling iri.

Jadi skor kita sama, satu-satu ;)

The Starbucks Paradox

WHY CAN'T WE?

:')

Sekedar Cerita

Hai, gw baru bangun tidur dan bermimpi temen-temen gw disana. Aaaarghhh, kangen. Kesepian disini deh. Sekarang abis kerja, paling sering gw mampir untuk minum es teh susu sama beli chitato, terus ngecek tukang dvd yang kok nggak buka-buka, atau paling ke KFC, makan ini itu, terus pulang ke kost. Di kosan, paling sering sih tidur, atau nggak surfing, download video-video lagu, mungkin udah seratus sejak gw sampe sini, atau palingan baca buku cerita atau artikel kedokteran yang perlu diulang bacanya. 

Ohya, Lubuk Linggau itu kota termaju kedua di Sumsel setelah Palembang. Menurut gw, ibaratnya, Lubuk Linggau ini ibarat Bogor di Jawa Barat, bedanya di Bogor ada mall dan banyak makanan enak, selain itu orangnya ramah-ramah hahaha. Linggau ini jaraknya sekitar enam jam via darat dari Palembang dan empat jam ke Bengkulu.

Engga ada tempat hangout aja sih, yang bikin bete haha. Tapi seneng juga tiap hari ngeliat kota ini punya wallpaper bukit sulap. Kadang kalau pagi atau sore hari, bukitnya diselimuti kabut, terus brrrrr kotanya dingin. Di depan rumah sakit, tiap pagi keliatan pasar utama sama bukitnya dari kejauhan. 

Ah, entahlah, baru dua minggu disini tapi lama bener jalannya. Semoga disini nanti menyenangkan deh. \m/

Amin :)

My First E.R Shift

Yesterday... was my very first shift as an E.R (Emergency Room) Doctor in a public hospita.

E.R

My very first shift was full of drama. Between 2 pm to 8 pm, I got about 20s patients, most of them (3/4) are traumatic patient from motorcycle accident. One of them finally died. 

There was the one with his head torn due to chopping knife, he even got a open skull fracture so we can see his brain inside. There was also a patient with stab injury, right exactly on his heart. When he arrived, he already got his only one last breath.

There are many dramas. The family who is going to chase after the murder, the police who confirmed, but the saddest thing is seeing the child, wife, or parents of the died patients cry, uncontrollable. Yesterday, the daughter (about 3 years old) crying and keep shouting "Uba..Uba.." (Father) to his late father, minutes later, his parents, came to see his body and moaning so desperately.

I think we all would appreciate life if we were there.

THERE WILL BE

 ALWAYS 

MANY DRAMA 

IN EVERY E.R

Waarwick Avenue

Warwick Avenue

You think you're loving but you don't love me

Hello, Internship

Hello, February 2012. Its been a long time not to write in this blog. Hmm, I'm just gonna tell you about my life. I was worked as a general practitioner in several private clinics in Jakarta for about three months and finally resign from it several weeks ago due to my Internship.

Let me tell you about Internship. Just like University of Indonesia, Padjajaran, Gajah Mada, and some other, University of Sriwijaya have this pathway of study: First, you take 3,5 years to complete the undergraduate program (Sarjana Kedokteran), then 1,5 year working in hospital as a clinical clerkship, after completed these two phase, you are Medical Doctor already (Dr.), so this is one step faster than the old program which took 6 years of education. But, as a consequence, we, who graduate doctor for 5 years, must undergo a program called Internship.

The Internship take 1 year to complete. We will be working in county-level public hospital (Rumah Sakit Umum Daerah Kabupaten) consist of 4 months working as Emergency Department Doctor, 4 months as a doctor in outpatients and inpatients department, and 4 months as a public health doctor.

I thank God for the internship than spending another one bloody year as a co-ass. well at least I didn't pay any school fee again, I even got a salary for every month I work in.

We divided into some groups consist of 5 people. Me and some random friends are going to do my internship in RSUD Sobirin Musi Rawas, located in Lubuk Linggau, about 6-7 hours by car or 8 hours from Palembang by train. It is the second largest city in South Sumatera province. Well, I believe I'm gonna have some adventures, lessons of life, and make many good friends and relationship there.

Two days more to go to my very first day of Internship. Dear, colleagues, I wish you the very best luck of all. And see you soon, dear, Home :)